Penelope Puppy takes a swim

I'll admit that there are times that I wish I had a girl instead of a boy. My son is just plain icky sometimes. Once his bladder is completely full he'll run to the bathroom with his pants and underwear at his ankles and spray everywhere in the vicinity of the toilet like a firehose. Gross Gross Gross!

Today I have confession on my son's awful stupid behavior and yet another time I wish I had a girl. His teacher sent him home with Penelope Puppy a stuffed animal for the evening and then Alex writes what he did with her in her journal. Alex had been playing with Penelope when he started doing the "Potty Dance". As usual, I asked him if he had to go and he wiggled around for another 5 minutes until his bladder was at maximum capacity and he sprinted for the bathroom. The next thing I hear is..."Momma, Penelope is all wet"...Oh no could it be? Yes it was..not only did he pee all around the toilet but dropped poor Penelope in the potty. Gross! I quickly washed her off and gave her a good blow dry with my hairdryer. As Alex was writing in Penelope's journal, he just didn't mention that she took a swim in our toilet. This situation would not have happened if I had a girl.

Drab! Drab! Drab!

I went to a dinner party last night where there was 12 other people and I really only knew 3 of the folks there. Seeing that it is Spring, I chose to wear my new pink dress which in Seattle is a very bold fashion statement. I normally can't wear pink but this is just a beautiful darker shade that I just love. Since the dress was sleeveless I wore a short sleeve white cardigan and my pointy white kitten heeled pumps. Mental note: those damn shoes are dangerous to walk in after a few too many drinks.

I show up to the party and all the women are dressed in what I call Seattle Drab.....jeans and some earth-toned shirt...I felt a little self conscience since I really didn't know these people that well but I reminded them all that it was Spring and you can officially wear white and other bright colors. After way too much wine, my husband had to listen to me rant about how much I hate the Seattle Drab fashion for the entire ride home. Drab! Drab! Drab! I kept saying to him.

I didn't get to bed until sometime around 1 AM and my kids were up by 7 AM ...Damn them! Here it is 8 AM, my head is pounding, and I'm laying in bed thinking it is never a good idea to stay out late and drink. To add insult to injury, my 3 year old is playing "Pong" with a ballon on my bed as I'm hoping that all the bouncing won't make me vomit. I'll never learn.

Lazy, Lazy, Lazy

Since Brian's surgery I can't seem to get motivated to make what I consider "progress" in my life. I usually try to set some goals to feel like I have maybe accomplished something above and beyond my housewife duties. I just putz around and get the normal things done...laundry, dishes, family feeding, and other various kid obligations. But man is my life boring right now. I need summer to come around soon to get out of this funk. Some sunshine and warm weather would sure help.

A little less bitchy over my insurance company

So I have always waged some sort of war with my insurance carrier - United Healthcare over the past few years. They always try to screw me on my coverage and fight paying anything that is in the gray area of my benefits program. I always lose my battles but it's all based on the principle of it!

But today I got Brian's hospital bill, $160k was sent to UHC and UHC paid them $127K and only billed us for $1300 bucks...Amazing! A month in the hospital and it only cost us $1300. That's like the rent for a nice apartment in Seattle that doesn't even have wait staff or room service. I feel I have finally gotten even with UHC for them screwing me over the past 10 years. We made them pay out a shit load of money to cover us! Take that you bastards! HA!

From Chicken Butt to Sticky Butt

I have been going to the Seattle Institute of Oriental Medicine's acupuncture clinic for a year now since my body is just whacked after Katie was born. It's a teaching clinic so there are always 4 students in the room with the practitioner. I go just about every other week and have been going to the same practitioner since last summer. In one of my sessions he said I have a Chicken Butt and need to work on it. I've been doing yoga regularly for a few months and it has reduce the flailing out of my Chicken Butt. Every few months I ask him if he thinks I'm a crazy hypochondriac but he always reassures me that my pain issues in my neck and sacrum are real.

I went to clinic today and did ask him if he thought I was crazy and he said no. Yippie! My ailment this week was a nasty hamstring pull that I did over a week ago and causes me much pain sitting. So as he was feeling around my saddlebags for a good spot to poke me with a needle he told the students that this area was feeling "sticky" and so you need to be careful the needle goes in the right spot. I immediately started chuckling to myself. Once he was finished putting in the needles, I annouced to the group that I went from Chicken Butt to Sticky Butt. The students laughed and I had a good chuckle but the practitioner just grunted at my joke. So was he really telling me the truth when he said he didn't think I was crazy?

Relieved!

I have dodged a major bullet...I was not the first one to put a dent in the UAV. I can't believe it wasn't me. It was such a relief that it was Brian's doing and not mine. I can now happily drive the big ass thing around without the constant worry that I may scratch it. Yippie!

April in Seattle is depressing

I think that there is no worse place to be then Seattle in April. After a long cold dark winter it becomes Spring. The days get longer, the cherry trees bloom and then the hard miserable rains start again. It's so contradictory to have the flowers and trees in bloom yet rain so relentlessly that you have to stay indoors.

I have vowed to plan a trip every year at the end or March or early April to escape from the the shear dreariness of the beginning of Spring in Seattle. This year's plans got totally derailed and I should have been basking in the 80 degree weather of Palm Desert but instead am settling for cold windy weather on the Oregon Coast. At least I'll be right on the Pacific Ocean which will bring me some comfort no matter what the weather brings and I'll have some good wine which helps make any situation better :)

Can I Blog?

Okay. I think about this blogging thing and it makes me wonder. Is my life really this unexciting that I can't think of things to write about? Does anybody really care how much poop I've cleaned up in a day from my two kids and cat who sometimes can't make it to the bathroom in time? The good thing is that my husband does not know about my blog and so I can vent about him too...yippie some privacy at last! I will try it out and see if this is a better use of my internet time than Facebook.